Beyonce: How A Star Shines.

Live blogging the Grammys tonight and away we go once Ryan Seacrest scampers in from the red carpet after letting slip (yeah, right) that he’ll be performing on We Are The World.  To quote Lionel Richie, “We had Dan Akroyd there so yes, you can sing.”

Gaga updated the opening with the real Gaga that mashed a circus, steampunk and a power ballad that has the likes of Alice Cooper and Elton John gushing to mainstream media about the latest to ascend the throne they built. Lady Gaga relises being a monster. That’s why Sir Elton donned specs years after shedding them from his act.

Gaga pulled all the specs and eye patches off and dueted with Sir Elton brilliantly. Alice Cooper said it best. Gaga works as an artist because she can sing.

Stephen Colbert does his schtick to a flat crowd including a once-over glance from Jay-Z. One liners: Jeff Beck has the all-time high score on Guitar Hero. Then he told his daughter to stay away from Katy Perry.

Finally Song of the Year on an iPad. Beyonce and co-writers win for Single Ladies. I’m not sure the songwriter award belonged to that track. It was certainly my choice as Record of the Year. Colbert talked so damn long that they played the songwriters off lightning-fast.

Jenny from the Block is up. We told you years ago that American Idiot would be a Broadway show. The Broadway cast and the once-punkers met onstage for GD’s title track. Writing hellacious hooks was never a problem although Joey Ramone probably revoked their place in Punk Heaven. The good news is that Tres Cool’s kids will never want for college tuition. So Green Day has been Glee’d. They won’t be the last.

There’s a promo for When in Rome masked as presenting. The actors shill for people to get interactive and vote for Bon Jovi to play one of three songs. Oy. The Pro Bowl is before the Super Bowl and now we get to vote on Grammy performances.

Best Country Album was Taylor Swift’s when the nominations were announced although Zac Brown Band sure had a chance. No Kanye sighting although Taylor’s delight is getting a bit tired. Taylor, you’re winning everything on every show. Accept it. Nice young woman. I’m sure it’s a dream.

CBS shills The Mentalist by trotting out Simon Baker without worrying about his accent. Hugh Laurie was undoubtedly jealous. I’m simply jealous because he introduced Beyonce. She is our generation’s Streisand and Cher rolled into one mixed with a supermodel’s looks.

The mix sounded off on my set, but was resolved about halfway through. The holding pen she sang to moved a little of the gravitas from the show, but music is about people so no complaints here. Beyonce threw a fake cold ending at the audience and owned the venue.