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Tag: Robert Plant

  • 51st Grammy Awards Play By Play – I May Need A Caffeine IV

    Money Mike and Paul live blogged the Grammy Awards earlier today. I’m on the West Coast so I get to watch the show on the dreaded tape delay. And just to make sure we have that West Coast point of view on the show, I’m going to give you the play by play as well.

    The last few years that I’ve blogged this show, I’ve mentioned the need for coffee. Last year I made it all the way through without coffee. I’m going for two years in a row. But I may need toothpicks to hold my eye lids open by the end of this thing.

    What’s this story that’s out about Chris Brown and Rihanna in a domestic dispute? I don’t want to jump to conclusions, but if any of this is true, it just shows that he has more in common with Papa Joe Jackson than Michael Jackson.

    • U2 opens up the show and I think Fat Albert should sue for gimmick infringement. Hey, hey, hey.
    • Whitty Houton is the first presenter for Best R&B Album and she has those boobs pushed up just about as far as they can go.
    • Jennifer Hudson won the award for her very bland debut album. I think people forgot that And I’m Telling You… was actually on the Dreamgirls album first.
    • There’s no better hype man than the Rock. I was waiting for him to say, “Uh huh, yeah!”
    • I wonder if in 1992, Boyz II Men would’ve thought they’d be relegated to singing back up for Rev Al Green and Justin Timberlake in 2009? Well, maybe Wanya.
    • The only thing I got out of that Chris Martin/Jay-Z duet is that both of them dudes need haircuts. Since when was fuzzy in?
    • There was a Diddy sighting! I think he said, “Uh huh yeah!”
    • Carrie Underwood is performing Last Name and for some reason, she didn’t know his last name. Uh, sweetie, his last name was Romo.
    • I think she’s also decided to get even skinnier for this performance as a last second dig at Jessica Simpson. Word to Jess – don’t wear high waist jeans.
    • LeAnn Rimes’s cheeks are so sunken in, she could be the third Olsen twin.
    • I wonder if when Al Green saw Duffy while waiting to present with her said, “So that’s what Duffy looks like.”
    Duffy at Hovefestivalen 2008
    Duffy at Hovefestivalen 2008
    • Viva La Vida won for Song Of The Year, which is deserving even though I liked nearly every other song on the list better. They were all pretty decent songs.
    • Hey, Kid Rock’s here. Wait, I thought he was directing Ice Cube movies. Whoops! That’s Fred Durst. Sorry.
    • Taylor Swift! Miley Cyrus! Together for the first time! When Average Happens!
    • Miley slanted her eyes for the song, but only because she was trying to hit some notes and had to squint.
    • Even though the song was entirely bland, Jennifer Hudson pulled through. With all that she’s been through, she definitely has a ton of charisma and is going to stick around. That Dreamgirls thing was no fluke y’all. She’s the real deal.
    • Wait, was that Stevie Wonder with the Jonas Brothers? So my favorite artist of all time with my kids’ favorite band? Only in America.
    • I think if the hip hop heads knew how much I was enjoying this, I’d get my card taken away.
    • Ok, I didn’t enjoy the Jonas’ doing Stevie’s Superstition as much as I enjoyed him doing Burnin’ Up.
    • Also, what’s the over/under on how many times Stevie’s performed this song at the Grammys or American Music Awards? 25?

    • Speaking of over/unders – where do we set how many more albums Katy Perry records that anyone ever listens to? One?
    • Since when did Kanye West get the same haircut as Apollo Creed from Rocky III? If the back was a little juicy, I’d have said the dude from Full Force.
    • Is it me or does Estelle look like Venus Williams? I bet she hits a helluva forehead. I mean forehand.
    • I want to apologize to Kenny Chesney for fast forwarding through his performance. I’m trying to catch up to live TV. I’ll get you next time Ken.
    • Diddy, Herbie Hancock, and Natalie Cole are together on screen to present for Record Of The Year. Hancock doesn’t look too happy. I think Diddy just told him he was going to remix Rock It.
    • Alison Krauss’ cleavage and Robert Plant won for I’ve Never Heard This Song In My Life.
    • I’m very uncertain about the Swagga Like Us performance. I think I need like an entire book to state my thoughts. From M.I.A. performing with that basketball underneath her sheer outfit to the black and white look, to T.I. eating the mic, to Jay-Z looking old enough to be everyone’s dad except for Kanye. I’m just really confused right now.
    • “Should I give up, or should I just keep chasing pavements?” That is the question.
    • Gwen Paltrow is much better spokeswoman for the no food and diuretics diet than Whitty Houton.
    • I’m unsure how I feel about Jamie Foxx, Smokedog Robinson, and Ne-Yo being a part of the Four Tops. Would any of the Four Tops have made a song with Adina Howard called T-Shirt & Panties?
    • I know, I haven’t written anything in the last 20 minutes. John Mayer, B.B. King, Neil Diamond, and Gary Sinese. They do all the crazy stuff early in the show.
    • The only way Robin Thicke gets on the Grammys is as a hook singer? Well, it is a helluva hook.
    • Jeez Lil’ Wayne is short. I guess that’s just not a clever name.
    • Who is that sitting next to T.I.? Wait, that’s the light skinded chick from Xscape. Is that one of his baby mamas?
      Xscape publicity shot
      Xscape publicity shot
    • I bet you the last thing you thought you’d see in a 2009 Grammy Awards post was a picture of Xscape.
    • Alison Krauss’ corset and Robert Plant just won Album Of The Year.
    • Wait, this is it? They’re not going an hour over like usual? Well, they just said Stevie Wonder is going to end the show. Steve might go for a half hour himself if they let him.
    • By the way, my favorite album and performer of the year, Ne-Yo was shut out of the big categories. I think they docked him for having that terrible thin mustache.
    • If I was too harsh, I apologize, and you can blame Money Mike. It’s his site. Ha!

      • Photo of Duffy by NRK_P3 and shared via creative commons
      Photo of Xscape by wikipedia

  • Mike & Paul Are Live Blogging the Grammys

    So Mike and I are watching the Grammys together (well, cyber-together at least) tonight and blogging as we go.  And away we go…

    U2 open up the show with their new single “Get On Your Boots”… a very chaotic performance of a song that I’m not entirely sold on yet.  I’m totally not sold on Bono’s new dance moves either.  Or Larry Mullen’s goth black hair.

    Oh my gawd, Whitney Houston is making Britney Spears look well-adjusted.   Her poor voice…  ugh, she’s hard to look at.

    Go Jennifer Hudson.  I didn’t have a clear favorite in the best R&B album category (Al Green would have been my personal pick, but his is the only one of the nominees I’ve really heard).  But I’m glad that Jennifer got this.

    Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson… newly minted karaoke star (I think his brief rendition of “Just the Way You Are” was better than Billy Joel).  Opens with a corny anagram.   Not promising.

    Boyz II Men, Keith Urban, Al Green and Justin…   I’m digging the deeper-voiced Al Green.  Still sexy.  I’m loving this whole number – it’s unadulterated joy.  U2 is distant memory.

    So, as we hit the first commercial break, we learn the following: Whitney is off the crack but still crack-ish, U2’s new single sounds almost exactly like “Vertigo”, and about 700 babies were conceived during the Al Green performance. We can now move on…

    Is this show going to be a big giant plug for CBS? What does Simon Baker have to do with music?

    When did Chris Martin become a solo artist? Oops…never mind…here’s the rest of the band.

    Someone should tell Chris that no one wants to see his treasure trail. Someone should also tell him to take dance lessons. Then someone should tell Jay-Z to get a haircut.

    Sorry, folks. Carrie Underwood is totally anonymous to me. She might as well be Faith Hill. Something tells me, however, that Faith would take exception to that.

    Here’s a country award, which goes to Sugarland. Paul, have you listened to these guys before? I have nothing to say, except the guy in the group is kinda hot.

    Paul here:   Mike, I love Sugarland…  their cover of “Life in a Northern Town” was one of the highlights of my year last year.    I’m with you on Carrie Underwood.  “Last Name” sounds like it’s about 3 years old now – actually when it started, I thought she was playing that… other song she did, like 3 years ago.  What the hell was it? (Mike: “Before He Cheats”)   But Carrie Underwood’s guitarist looked to Carrie Underwood’s 80s hair metal doppelganger, and the two of them standing side by side as they wailed at the end was sort of interesting.  (The Sugarland guy IS hot)

    Coldplay was sort of fun to watch… like U2 circa 1982.

    Congratulations Gene Autry and Brenda Lee… but Grammy’s got better things to do.   Moving on…

    Al Green and Duffy harmonizing a capella at the microphone.  Al Green should release a new record every year just so that he can be on the Grammys some more.

    It’s hard to argue with Coldplay’s “Viva La Vida” winning Song of the Year.   Chris Martin proving refreshingly taciturn.

    Did Kid Rock finish his community service yet?  Does singing “Amen” count for it?  I hate “Sweet Home Alabama”, but I love Kid Rock’s song about it (“All Summer Long”), and I wish he just would have stuck with it instead of doing this trio of “American Idol” style snippets.  It just never got off the ground for me, where a good all-star rave-up of “All Summer Long” would have been awesome.

    Mike!  Look!  Sugarland are going to play later on.  Prepare your bib.

    Mike’s back. I’ll just borrow the bib that Jennifer Hudson is wearing.

    WTF is Miley Cyrus doing on the Grammy Awards? Although it seems as though she’s already mastered the “O” face.

    Robert Plant & Alison Krauss win Best Pop Collaboration with Vocals. I called that one. I wonder what they would have said if Chris Brown had won. “We’re sorry, but Chris Brown beat up some chick and couldn’t make it to the show tonight”.

    Jenny Hud is back in a much better looking dress. Damn, that girl has some pipes on her.

    Paul here:    There is just a lot of really, really bad white boy dancing going on tonight.  And Stevie Wonder seriously deserves better than to be upstaged by the Jonas Brothers…  who need to learn to shut up while Stevie’s singing.  And who need to spend a little time with the lyric sheet before they take on a song like “Superstition”.   What did Simon Cowell say about “forgetting the words” this week?    This performance just leaves me feeling a little…  well, okay yeah, pissed off.

    Oooooh, Blink 182 – together again!   Oooooh, Coldplay wins again!  Chris Martin – not as taciturn.  Effusive, in fact.  But still sincere, and far more likable than I’d imagined he would be.

    A couple other things:  Taylor Swift looks like a gelfling.  There.  I’ve said it.   And she and Miley don’t blend.

    Jennifer Hudson is my hero tonight.  Simple.  Elegant.  Classy.  The one person with the most legitimate excuse for drama, and she comes off both powerful and humble.  And damn, she can sing.  She didn’t need the choir.  In fact, I wish they would have left the choir home.

    Mike’s back. Paul…what’s a gelfing?

    I vote for Craig Ferguson to host next year.

    Dear Katy Perry. P!nk called.She wants her schtick back.

    I kissed a boy and I liked it. Do I get to perform on the Grammy Awards?

    Kanye West appears, apparently having stolen Michael Jackson’s look circa 1981.

    mj81

    Oh that Kanye. He so crazy!!!

    The Jonas Brothers lost Best New Artist because Adele ate them. Oh, and then she dissed them!!!!!! I love Adele!!

    Latifah’s introducing Jay, Kanye, Wayne and T.I….this should be good.

    The sound is awful. These guys are rappers-shouldn’t some body be kicking the sound man’s ass?

    Didn’t someone perform “I Saw Her Standing There” on the Grammys just a couple of years ago? (answer: yes. Dave Matthews and several others did…I think it might have been a Beatles tribute performance)

    My friend Marc: “Doesn’t Michael Jackson still own this song?”. Why, yes, he does!

    Paul here:  Adele not only ate the Jonas Brothers – she liked them.  I’m really into Katy Perry right now, but she sounded a little out of breath.   Also, I’m just really so excited that Cathy Dennis has done so well for herself as a songwriter.

    Mike, you’re right.  The sound during the “hip hop summit” was godawful (actually, the sound throughout the show has been pretty sucky), and the whole thing ended up sounding like nothing but a shouting match – and maybe that’s sorta what it was supposed to be, but then that’s kind of an aberration of the word “summit”.  That said:  holy pregnant M.I.A. belly!

    Gelflings:

    gelflings1

    Don’t tell me you’ve never seen “The Dark Crystal”…

    Actually, I thought Kanye looked like one of the guys from Ready For the World.

    rftw

    Is someone aiming a laser-pointer at Sugarland?  God, I love this woman’s voice.

    I keep expecting Adele to start singing “Situation”.

    I was sure that Morgan Freeman was introducing Neil Diamond.  Imagine my disappointment.  I still haven’t entirely forgiven Kenny Chesney for the summer that I couldn’t go into a karaoke bar without hearing a really drunken version of “She Thinks My Tractor’s Sexy”.   Also, I have a hard time picturing Kenny and Morgan hanging out together.  What do they talk about?   Any ideas, Mike?

    Paul, are you trying to lead me into a joke that I don’t want to make? Actually, when I saw Morgan Freeman, I remembered how happy I was that “The Electric Company” is back on TV.

    The USC Marching Band is joining Radiohead on stage. Somewhere, Lindsey Buckingham and Stevie Nicks are sitting somewhere saying “but didn’t we…?”

    Gwyneth Paltrow has two babies and still doesn’t have titties.

    Thom Yorke and Chris Martin obviously graduated from the same dancing school.

    Holy Quick Commercials Batman! It’s back to you, Paul.

    (and I keep wanting to say “But Paul, I think I told you. I’m a lover, not a fighter”).

    OK, I’ll admit: I really like that T.I./Timberlake song

    Do we really need Neil Diamond singing “Sweet Caroline”?

    God, I just felt like I was at a Sox game.

    Here’s the deceased folks tribute. Nothing snarky to say here.

    BB King and co. are going off on the guitar tribute to Bo Diddley. Good stuff.

    (OK, I think we’ve officially lost count of who goes where).

    Yet another CBS crossover with Gary Sinise performing. Next, the cast of “How I Met Your Mother”.

    OK…why isn’t Robin Thicke as popular as Justin Timberlake?

    Damn it, I need to go down to N.O. one year. Mardi Gras, here I come?

    Hip-hop is holding it down this year, folks.

    It’s Rap music’s Talentless Twins: T-Pain and will.i.ain’t

    Lil Wayne, to no one’s suprise, wins Rap Album of the Year and delivers a fairly succinct speech. As much of a critic of modern-day rap music as I am, I gotta say that we redeemed ourselves nicely this year.

    Zoe Deschanel sings?

    Plant and Krauss are performing…unless Plant jumps into “The Crunge”, I’ll only be sort of playing attention.

    They also win Album of the Year-entirely predictable…

    And the ceremony is over! Paul, any closing thoughts?

    I actually liked that Robert Plant was so into talking about the process of creating “Raising Sand” in all of his acceptance speeches, but as usual, I hate Grammy’s pick for Album of the Year.  “Raising Sand” is a fine record, but I don’t think it was the definitive “Album of the Year”.   It should have gone to either Lil Wayne or Coldplay.

    Thanks Mike for riding this out with me.   It’s been fun!

  • SonicClash Handicaps the 2009 Grammy Awards V: In Rainbows

    jobros

    These are for all the marbles, boys and girls. Grammy’s four major categories are the ones every artist dreams of winning. Even Best New Artist, which portends a solid future as an artist despite the legend of the Best New Artist “curse” (tell that to Christina Aguilera, Mariah Carey, Maroon 5 or John Legend). Here are the nominees in the four “big” categories.

    Record of the Year: “Chasing Pavements” (Adele)/”Viva La Vida” (Coldplay)/”Bleeding Love” (Leona Lewis)/”Paper Planes” (M.I.A.)/”Please Read the Letter” (Robert Plant & Allison Krauss)

    Will Win: Coldplay

    Should Win: M.I.A.

    Coldplay is almost certain to pull off an Amy Winehouse-like near-sweep this year, as “Viva La Vida” will win nearly every award it’s nominated for. The elderly voting bloc of Grammy voters could potentially pull out an upset for Plant & Krauss, and Clive Davis could get a win for his latest protege Leona Lewis, but I think this one goes to Chris Martin and co. Hey, did anyone realize this category is all Brits? What does that say about the status of American music? And how cool is it gonna be to see a very pregnant M.I.A. sashay across the stage to perform “Paper Planes”?

    Album of the Year: “Viva La Vida or Death & All His Friends” (Coldplay)/”Tha Carter III” (Lil Wayne)/”Year of the Gentleman” (Ne-Yo)/”Raising Sand” (Robert Plant & Allison Krauss)/”In Rainbows” (Radiohead)

    Will Win: Plant & Krauss

    Should Win: Radiohead

    Ne-Yo’s nomination itself was a shocker, so he doesn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell of winning. Despite Weezy’s having the biggest-selling album of 2008, Grammy does not acknowledge hardcore rap in its’ main categories (remember “The Marshall Mathers LP” losing to Steely Dan back in ’01?), so that leaves Radiohead (whose win would be the biggest music-industry “fuck you” ever), Coldplay, and Plant & Krauss, who will most likely snatch this award up, given the Grammy folks’ penchant for a) honoring folks at the twilight of their careers and b) honoring legends late in their careers who’ve completely gotten the shaft in their original, legendary incarnations. Keep in mind that Led Zeppelin never won a Grammy. This is payback time for Plant.

    Song of the Year: “American Boy” (Estelle feat. Kanye West)/”Chasing Pavements” (Adele)/”I’m Yours” (Jason Mraz)/”Love Song” (Sara Bareilles)/”Viva La Vida” (Coldplay)

    Will Win: Coldplay

    Should Win: Adele

    The Bareilles song is a little too jingle-happy for my taste, so I count it out simply by virtue of me not liking it. The Mraz song is also a bit featherweight, and…why am I explaining all of this? Coldplay wins again, although the awfully pretty “Chasing Pavements” would be a better choice.

    Best New Artist: Adele/Duffy/Jonas Brothers/Lady Antebellum/Jazmine Sullivan

    Will Win: Jonas Brothers

    Should Win: This is not a very strong category.

    Um…where’s Leona Lewis? Sara Bareilles? Estelle? OneRepublic? All of these artists were left off in favor of on-their-third-album-so-hardly-new-artists The Jonas Brothers? Gimme a fuckin’ break. If there’s anything that convinces me more that The Grammys are rigged, it’s this category. The JoBros will win simply by virtue of no one having heard of anyone else in the category!

    And like Porky the Pig said, that’s all folks! Stay tuned later tonight for SonicClash’s liveblog of the Grammy Awards and you can also see whether my predictions were right! Enjoy the show!!