Ryno opens the show talking about last nights Idol Gives Back show. I believe they are still taking donations at 1-877-IDOL-AID. At least that’s what Zack and Cody just said.
The contestants sing Shout To The Lord and then Ryno shows more celebrity stuff that they didn’t show last night. When you get Ricki Lake, the Kardashians, Kobe Bryant, Dr. Phil, Rob Schneider and others lip syncing I’m A Believer, that’s quality entertainment. But Ricki Lake?
– Brooke White is curly tonight, extremely pasty, but definitely safe.
– Pompous David Cook is also safe. Was it me, or were they trying to turn him into a sexy symbol last night? With that hair?
– Big Dave Archuleta is also safe and gives Brooke White a stiff high five.
– Jordin Sparks and Chris Brown must really have no air because I think they’re lip syncing at least part of their hit single No Air.
– Jason Castro’s Dread Locks and Kristy Lee Cook are safe leaving Michael Johns, Syesha Mercado, and Carly Smithson in the bottom three.
– If I were to guess who would’ve been kicked out of the those three, I’d have guessed either girl. But that’s not the case. Big Rube Studdard celebrates Michael Johns home.
– The crowd is shocked, but I don’t think it’s that big of a deal. He wasn’t going to win the competition anyway. Seacrest out!
I didn’t plan on writing about this show, but after I thought about it, it’s a huge show (some 2 1/2 hours in length) and it’s for a great cause. If I should write about any American Idol show, this is probably the one. You can donate at AmericanIdol.com. You can also call 1-877-IDOL-AID.
– I wonder if Kanye West will show up thinking it’s another awards show and get angry early when his name doesn’t get called.
– Let’s hope Ramiele isn’t nervous tonight. You can’t get kicked off again Ramiele, don’t worry.
– David Cook singing Rihanna – where amazing happens!
– Why is it that when the show started and all these dancers from If You Think You Can Dance were hot steppin’ on the dance floor, I immediately thought, “Where are the Jabbawockeez when you need them?”
Act Like Ya Know
– By the way, Paula’s boobs aren’t popping out as far tonight. Arsenio Hall just turned off the television.
– Why is Maria Shriver on my television in the year 2008? Oh yah, she’s married to Arnold. Her cheeks have a life of their own by the way.
– Ryno just said that you can donate money by buying some of these performances on iTunes. David Cook singing Rihanna can be yours and it’s right at your fingertips.
– The es-en-double-o-pee and Charlie Wilson Can’t Say Goodbye. Charlie’s wearing one of MJ’s old glitter derby hats while rockin’ the mic.
– Teri Hatcher just finished singing Carrie Underwood’s Before He Cheats (this song has to be about Tony Romo) and Kristy Lee Cook just called her pitchy. Isn’t that like the pot calling the kettle dark skinned? I’m kidding. KL Cook probably thought it was great.
KL Cook’s Favorite Singer
– Let’s see. Billy Crystal is an old school comic. Miley Ray Cyrus is the hot new thing. And they can’t find anything entertaining for them to say for a very long five minutes. Well, it was still better than Forget Paris.
– They kick Chikezie off the show, but they still make the brother work the phones.
– Since this isn’t the time to necessarily be making fun of folks, I’ll hold off from saying that Fergie’s face resembles Secretariat. And plus, she did a decent job with Finally, with help from John Legend on the piano.
(She also performed with Heart who Idol owes some love considering all the female Idol hopefuls jack their songs. Fergie Ferg is also wearing a glitter wrap around her wrist. Yet another ode to MJ.)
– You know this is a big show when Eli and Peyton Manning take the big stage. Let’s just say they are better with the Xs and Os than they are at reading queue cards.
– The story about the kids who lost their parents to AIDS and were worried about being positive themselves was tough to watch. Yes, I can write this up without joking around. I haven’t shed a tear though. Yet.
– Celine Dion is on the show again this year, but she didn’t bring Elvis this time.
– Jimmy Kimmell just said that on some nights, it looks like Simon is smuggling the Olsen twins underneath his shirt.
– Sheila E. just came out and she still has it.
– The Idol contestants are singing Seasons Of Love. Teri Hatcher tried to get on stage and join them, but Dean Cain swooped in and saved the day. (That didn’t really happen by the way, but you know it would’ve been 10 shades of awesome if it did.)
– Dane Cook is still in show business? I just want to hear him say Daisuke Matsuzaka one more time.
– Miley Ray Cyrus again? Isn’t it past her bedtime?
For Our Young Demographic
Save for Brad Pitt wearing a Kangol (don’t worry Brad, I can’t really rock it well either), this was a very compelling TV show. I know, I know. Because it’s Idol, they’re going to get lots of money donated. And while they are going to get good ratings out of this, it’s still a great thing to do. I’m off to download some songs from iTunes to give back.
*So, the NKOTB reunion is in full-swing. The first photo of all the guys together since 1994 is making the rounds, and I gotta say time has been kind to The Kids. They’re on the “Today” show tomorrow, performing and announcing their tour, and I gotta say, I’m pretty stoked! More so to hear the new material than to go see them live, though.
*Speaking of artists that haven’t performed live in forever, George Michael is touring the U.S. for the first time since 1991, promoting his new “Twenty-Five” hits compilation. I love George, and he remains a singular vocalist who really isn’t all that exciting live. However, considering the man tours so infrequently, it might be a good idea to catch him now.
*Congrats are due to Mariah Carey and Madonna. “Touch My Body” became Mariah’s 18th #1 hit this week, pushing her into second place, behind The Beatles, when it comes to artists with #1 songs. Meanwhile, “4 Minutes” has become Madge’s 38th Top Ten hit, also bumping her into second place all-time, behind, you guessed it, The Beatles!!
*Wow, all I have to do is throw a Hammer or Vanilla Ice reference, and the artists mentioned in this column so far could have just as easily been mentioned in 1990. How ’bout staying power, eh?
*Bobby Brown is writing an autobiography, which promises to dish tons of dirt on Whitney Houston, including the fact that Whit introduced him to cocaine and that she married him to improve her image. Um, wasn’t *Whitney* America’s good girl when she and Bobby got married? What needed improvement? And who knew Bobby could write?
*Finally, in my current guilty pleasures list, the guys from Fall Out Boy have recorded a pretty nifty cover of “Beat It”, featuring some serious shredding from John Mayer on guitar. I’m not quite sure why I like Fall Out Boy so much. Maybe I take pity on the overwhelming ugliness of Patrick Stump. Anyway, here’s their cover for you (best to ignore the video loop of Patrick Stump blowing kisses):
