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Tag: Dirty Money

  • American Idol Season 10 – Who Makes The Final 12?

    If you missed last night’s American Idol show, head over to Popblerd!, which is where I’ll be writing my Wednesday play-by-plays. On this website, I’ll do the Thursday show, recapping who goes home.

    Last night, I thought Karen, Ashthon, and Thia could be in the bottom three. I also don’t know for sure how many folks are being eliminated tonight. I seem to remember the last time they brought thirteen to the finals, they eliminated two on the first night.

    Puffy and Dirty Money and Adam Lambert are on stage tonight (in separate performances) for the show. Diddy can have his Dirty Money. But give me my Danity Kane and Day 26 back, and even Donnie Klang if you have to.

    Ryno Seacrest said that Casey was sick and in the hospital, so he wasn’t on stage tonight. The group is performing Michael Jackson’s Wanna Be Starting Something and Rock With You. I couldn’t really tell how the performance was because I was too busy looking at Pia and waiting for her to appear on screen again. I do know that Jacob Lusk was doing some terrible dancing. They also went into Black Or White and Man In The Mirror. Looks like Thia wanted to sing Smile again, but they vetoed her and told her these were real Michael Jackson songs.

    Ryno interviewed Amanda Seyfried who is in the new movie, Red Riding Hood. Seyfried looks like she could’ve been in the animated film A Bug’s Life and she wouldn’t even need to be animated. Her eyes are so big, it’d take hubcaps to blind fold her. And I think the wolf is offended in the movie when she tells him, “What big eyes you have.”

    Ryno pulls Jacob, Stefano, and Karen to the stage. Karen is in the bottom three. Jacob and Stefano hugged like they just won the World Series.

    Adam Lambert is singing Aftermath. His hair is more poofy this time, like a young Brandon Walsh in his prime. And I’m jealous. I think he’s sizing up James Durbin for competition as Idol’s biggest wailer. There was this very odd live television moment where Ryno said he Dougie’d to the remix of Lambert’s song and then J. Lo called him out on it. She then bopped her shoulders back and forth and can get away with it because she can actually dance and she’s J. Lo. Though I’m not sure that was quite enough Dougie.

    Ryno invited Lauren, Ashthon, and Haley to the stage. Lauren isn’t leaving. We know this, man. She’s safe. Haley and Ashton are in the bottom three. Well, I predicted all girls, but I got the wrong third girl. Thia’s peoples definitely represented for her.

    Puffy and his Dirty Money crew are on stage to perform Coming Home. Where the heck is my girl Dawn? And why is Skylar Grey here? Wait, she may sing on the actual song.

    (I was told that Dawn was there, but for whatever reason, I missed her.)

    Did you know that Diddy hates the songs Tears Of A Clown and A House Is Not A Home? Did you also know that it’s easy to be Puff, but harder to be Sean? And really, it’s hard for him when his twins ask him why he ain’t marry their mom. Did you also know that he would’ve taken the bullet if he saw it?

    Puff decided to talk to the crew and you could see it in Jacob Lusk’s eyes that he was so happy that he didn’t try to make the band. He didn’t want to be the next E. Ness, Young City, Babs Bunny, or Q.

    Ryno is back with the girls in the bottom three. Karen is safe. If Haley is eliminated, we riot. Ashthon just gave Puff a dirty look because she’s coming home. She has to sing for the judges now to see if she’ll be saved.

    Ashthon did Diana Ross again and it was better than last night, but it’s not good enough to be saved. Ashthon is gone. David Cook sings Ashthon home. He sings the new goodbye song and it’s his own version of Don’t You Forget About Me. And it’s pretty terrible. She joins the likes of Brandon Rodgers, Vanessa Olivarez, Lindsey Cardinale, and David “Stripper” Hernandez as folks who are eliminated in the first week of the finals.

  • American Idol Season 9 – Who Makes The Top 9?

    Didi Benami
    Didi Done Did It This Time
    I’ve done pretty well at calling the first two eliminations and soon, they will be harder and harder to call. But I’ll call it here again. I don’t think Miss Didi Benami is going to make it to next week. When contestants don’t look happy performing and it seems as if they aren’t having fun, it doesn’t necessarily inspire people to vote for them. I think that’s what happens to Didi.

    They pulled Ruben Studdard out of the closet they were hiding him in and he performed what seems like a new single. You can tell how much a crowd enjoys a performance by how many times the artist has to ask the crowd to get into it. Studdard must’ve asked the crowd at least three times to clap along with him. Maybe next time he should get on his knees and beg. “Come on y’all!”

    Ryno Seacrest just said that Ruben and Clay Aiken were going on tour together. It’s like if Luther Vandross and Elton John impostors were touring together.

    Onto the contestants …

    Ryno asks Lee Dewyze to stand up. Lee goes on and on about his performance last night, but still looks constipated. How can the guy look constipated every week? Give the brother some fiber. He’s safe.

    Ryno asks Casey to stand up and asks him how he can challenge himself. The first words out of Casey’s mouth were, “I mean …” No Case, we have no idea what you mean because you didn’t say anything yet. He’s safe.

    Aaron Kelly is up and Ryno asks him if he’s ever really been in love. Aaron says that his nether regions were aflutter when he saw Miley Cyrus last week. Ok, he didn’t say that. Ryno told him he was safe anyway.

    Creepy girl and Katie stand up together. Creepy girl isn’t living down her nickname with her wardrobe. Katie is in the bottom three. Simon says that he wishes Katie would’ve taken his advice as if to say that if she did, she wouldn’t be in the bottom three. Don’t worry Simon, she’s not going home.

    Justin Bieber is sitting in the crowd to watch Usher perform. Hey, I just wrote about Bieber-Mania today.

    Usher’s performing OMG, his newest single. It’s only the worst song on his new album. The girl might make Usher say, “Oh my God”, but the song makes me roll my eyes. The guy is simply too talented to put out crap like this. And to make things worse, will.i.am shows up to throw his terrible rhymes into the ether.

    By the time this thing was over, I was hoping that Demi Lovato and Joe Jonas were going to save him.

    Back to the evicting – it’s Didi’s turn. I have a bad feeling about this. I think Ryno could’ve told her to sit down and she would’ve just walked to the other side of the stage to join Katie anyway. Didi is in the bottom three, and all of you participating in the Sonic Spring Singing Contest were all right on the money in picking her, just like George wrote today.

    Ryno tricked Big Mike into thinking he was in the bottom three and in turn, Big Mike picked Ryno up and nearly threw him into the air. Ryno better check his shorts during the next commercial.

    Crystal is also safe. Timothy and Andrew stand up together. Timothy is the smartest person in this competition. He just told America that the reason he smiles is because he’s the luckiest man on the face of the earth. Or something like that. But he’s genuinely likable no matter how badly he sucks the big sloppy dunky one. Andrew is safe and Teflon Timothy is in the bottom three.

    Ryno sends Katie back to safety. It’s Didi vs. Timothy in a “Who is more terrible?” competition.

    Diddy and his group “Dirty Money” are performing tonight for whatever reason. This performance was actually not half bad. But in the 13 years that Diddy has been a recording artist, he still can’t rap worth a damn. And just to think, he was friends with one of the greatest rappers of all time. Just goes to show you that rapping is just as much of a talent as singing is. You can fake it to make it, but skills are skills.

    I just thought about this. We have a Didi and a Diddy on the same show.

    Teflon Timothy does it again. Didi Benami is on her way out, but she’s trying to sing her way back on the show hoping that the judges will save her from doom. It’s actually a really solid performance, but it also shows that her range is pretty weak. If Simon and company bring her back, I’ll eat my hat.

    Simon says he’s not going to save her, saving Didi for another week of unhappy singing and saving me from having to eat my hat. It’s time for Didi to leave right now.

    Photo of Didi Benami shared via Wikipedia