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  • Friday Throwback – Love Will Never Do (Without You)

    I know East Coasters, I know. It’s not Friday any longer. It’s Saturday. But for us West Coasters, it’s still Friday, and thus, I can still do a Friday Throwback.

    With Janet Jackson’s latest tour in full swing, I started to think about when it was that I started really digging her. If you’ve seen some of the photos and video of her tour, it’s pretty sexual, but that’s been the status quo since about 1993 when janet. came out. She was always very pretty, and if you remember the video for Pleasure Principle, wasn’t afraid to show off her curves. But really, it was the video for what became the last single from Rhythm Nation, that started her change from a pretty girl who dressed to be pretty, to a sexy woman who dressed to break necks.

    – All it took was a halter top that showed her midriff and some tight jeans and she was now one of the sexiest women in America.

    – How did she get her voice so deep? If this was Kanye, I’d say auto tune, but it isn’t.

    – “They said it wouldn’t last, we had to prove them wrong, ’cause I’ve learned in the past that love will never do without you.”

    – The fellas weren’t the only ones who loved this video. Thanks to Antonio Sabato Jr. and a young Djimon Hounsou, the ladies remember this video very well.

    – Does Janet even do one wardrobe change?

    – You know what I could do without? Those dudes wearing those bikini briefs like they’re trying to smuggle bananas.

    – Damn, 1991 Janet might’ve been the most untouchable Janet ever.

  • Yup, You Read it Right-Wayne Brady Made a Good Album

    The cover of Wayne Brady's new album, "A Long Time Coming".
    The cover of Wayne Brady

    Of course you know who Wayne Brady is. Whether you watched him on the improv show “Whose Line is It Anyway?”, were a fan of his talk/variety show, caught him as the host of “Don’t Forget the Lyrics” or checked him out in an unforgettable “Chappelle’s Show” sketch (which is where I got the title of this review from…I’m not being vulgar just for the sake of vulgarity), you’re aware of the dude, and you might also know that the guy can carry a tune. He’s utilized his singing chops in every assignment he’s had.What you may not have known (until now, anyway), is that Wayne Brady has put out an album. And unlike fellow actors-turned-musicians like Don Johnson and Bruce Willis, Brady’s debut, Long Time Coming, is GOOD. I don’t say this sarcastically or facetiously, and I am not drunk or on drugs (today). If you are a fan of smooth, grown-folks style soul music, you will find plenty to enjoy here.I would never have given a solitary thought to picking this album up if not for glancing at a Billboard magazine one day and noticing the name Wayne Brady loitering near the bottom of the R&B singles charts. “Nah, it can’t be,” I said initially. A little more research revealed that he had an album on the way, so my curiosity got the better of me and I checked YouTube and then iMeem for the song. After I hit paydirt on the latter site, expecting a cheesy pop song or a show tune/standard, my ears were blessed with the easygoing, smooth sound of first single Ordinary. After debating whether to spring for the whole album, I parted with my money just a couple of days later. I figured if it sucked it would just gain a place among the many other crappy albums in my collection.

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  • 1991 MTV Video Music Awards – Funky Like Doo Doo

    I was looking through old video tapes some time ago and found a copy of the 1991 MTV VMAs. It reminded me how fun this show used to be. Let’s pretend it’s 1991 again and that I’m live blogging this thing. I’m 15 years old and ready to kick it like Arsenio.

    It’s now Arsenio’s third appearance in a row as host for the VMA’s and the dude is hot. Here’s to his Arsenio Hall Show being on the air until we’re all old and gray. Woof, woof, woof!

    Word on the street is that there’s a special guest to open the show. I wonder who it is?

    • It’s Pee Wee Herman!
    • Arsenio says it’s the 8th edition of the VMAs, but it’s the 10th anniversary of MTV.
    • He says everyone is in the back except Elvis and Rick James. Rick, did you have to burn her with the crack pipe? Couldn’t you have burned her with a cigarette or something?
    • Van Halen opens up the show. Time for me to use the restroom.
    • Everyone is wearing red ribbons for AIDS awareness. Where’s Magic?
    • Linda Hamilton has some big ass lips, but Steven Tyler might be skinnier than her.
    • REM wins for Best Group Video and I have a feeling they’ll be up many more times for Losing My Religion.
    • Downtown Julie Brown has a bright career ahead of her. I can just feel it.
    • Christian Slater just won the award for Worst Presenter At Reading Queue Cards.
    • How can C&C Music Factory steal Arsenio’s line for their new song? It’s just one of those things that make you go hmmmm …
    • Dude from C&C is wearing a see through blouse, biker shorts, nylons, and stirrups and keeps grabbing his package on stage. Maybe that’s to show us that he’s still a dude.
    • Hey, it’s Lenny Kravitz. Where’s Denise Huxtable?
    • REM wins again for Breakthrough Video and Michael Stipe just says, “Ok”. Great speech.
    • DJ Jazzy Jeff and The Fresh Prince are out to introduce the Best Dance Video. Our parents just don’t understand.
    • C&C Music Factory won by the way. Even that girl who can’t sing.
    • Mariah Carey is performing Emotions. Jeez, this girl is always wearing long sleeved blouses. She’s going to be 35 years old and wearing long sleeves. You can show some skin girl!
    • If REM wins one more award, I’m going to stop …. jeez, they just won Best Direction.
    • Cindy Crawford might be on my Top Five Women That I Want To Be “Romantically Linked” To If I Was Famous list. But wait, she’s going to be old one day. And maybe not so hot.
    • EMF aren’t that Unbelievable by the way.
    • I bet you anything that the lead singer of Color Me Badd gets really, really fat. Call it a hunch.
    • When did Janet Jackson get so hot? I didn’t even know she had breasts.
    • Who knew that MC Hammer had someone named Ho Frat Ho helping him with choreography?
    • Paula Abdul is looking a little chunky and she’s trying to sing live. I approve of lip synching here.
    • Why is Eazy E wearing little white shorts? That’s not gangster.
    • Woohoo! Rap Video Of The Year went to Double L who’s gonna rock the bells. That’s my man.
    • They should rename Queensryche, Queenswrongche.
    • Wayne’s World, party time, excellent!
    • Did I just say that LL was my man? Well, he is, but so is Brandon Walsh, who is presenting with Jennifer Connelly for Best New Artist. Hey, LL would let Brandon Walsh hang out in his hood. (Jesus Jones won by the way.)
      • LL just rocked the show with the performance of the night in a leather derby cap, leather pants, a big gold medallion, some nikes, and a silver belt, while shirtless.
      • The Video Vanguard Award is now the Michael Jackson Video Vanguard Award. Really, this show should be called the MTV Michael Jackson Music Awards. (By the way, Bon Jovi won the MJ award.)
      • The censor is about a half second off on every curse word.
      • The drummer for Metalica is dressed exactly like LL, except without the hat and gold medallion.
      • That Daisy Fuentes from MTV Mexico is kind of cute.
      • James Brown and MC Hammer just gave it three times for Arsenio. Hey, hey, hey!
      • Queenswrongche just won the Viewer’s Choice Award. I can live with that as long as it wasn’t REM.
      • LL is still sweaty from his performance. Go take a shower man!
      • Is Don Henley right for this show? The song is great, but he’s not shirtless, doesn’t have a mohawk, and isn’t wearing a woman’s blouse.
      • Guns N’ Roses are live from London and Axl Rose is wearing a kilt, what looks like a mini wrestling belt, and is just as sweaty as LL is.
      • Let’s hope that Gerardo doesn’t win Male Video Of The Year. I’m rooting for George Michael, just to see if Cindy Crawford accepts with him. Damn, Chris Isaak won.
      • Let’s do a poll. Is Cher really all that sexy? I say not, even as much as she forces it.
      • If Janet Jackson doesn’t win for Female Video, this show is rigged. Woohoo! But she’s not even there to accept. Must’ve been because they didn’t name the Video Vanguard after her.
      • Prince is on stage with the New Power Generation and his first move was to fall flat on his stomach and have other men jump on top of him, while thrusting him from behind.
      • There are also several men and woman in thong underwear cavorting on stage.
      • And Prince himself is wearing pants where the parts covering up his butt are gone, so if you ever wanted to see Prince’s butt cheeks, this is your chance.
      • Arsenio just said it was funky like doo doo.
      • Well, I didn’t get George and Cindy winning an award together, but they are out to present the Video Of The Year.

      • Cindy just said Prince stole her yellow pants. If they were really Cindy’s pants, Prince would’ve had to roll them up about three or four times.
      • And guess who wins for Video Of The Year? If you guessed anyone but REM, you’d be wrong.