Rachel Crow, Josh Krajcik, LeRoy Bell
Stacy Francis, Chris Rene, The Stereo Hoggz
I hit it right on the money with InTENsity last week. We’ll see if anyone from my bottom three goes home tonight.
If you thought Marcus Canty’s glitter jacket was a bit obnoxious last night, he’s wearing a white tux tonight during the group song. So is Rachel Crow, but she can get away with it.
Also, in case y’all are wondering, Astro can rap. Chris Rene can’t.
And as much as I wished it wasn’t the case, Mr. Anti-charisma, Steve Jones is back. I sort of hoped he was hit by a bus this morning and broke his foot. Alas, my terrible wishes didn’t prove true.
LA Reid apologized for saying that Melanie Amaro’s performance wasn’t all that creative. He admitted that he was drinking a tall glass of haterade last night.
Willow Smith is on stage performing Fireball. I have nothing against Will and Jada’s baby girl, but I’m not exactly sure what I just saw. She kind of half-rapped half-sung a mess of a song in a tight overalls jumpsuit. Rather than hit us with some of the elimination, Mr. Anti-charisma introduces Jessie J who has sold over 8 million records worldwide. She’s sold so many records that I’ve never heard of her. She’s either a Katy Perry or Lady Gaga knockoff, I’m not sure which.
(If you watched the most recent MTV VMAs, she was the girl singing songs between commercials for the audience.)
Finally, it’s elimination time.
The first person in is Stacy Francis.
Your boy Astro is also in.
Your girl Melanie Amaro is also in. No groups are in yet and Paula is nervous.
Marcus Canty is next, glitter jacket and all.
LeRoy Bell is also in and Nicole is so happy that two of hers made it through.
Rachel Crow is also back next week. Paula is now really, really nervous.
Josh Kracjik is in. I think both of Paula’s groups are in the bottom two. She might go crazy.
Drew is in. It’s now between Paula’s groups and Chris Rene. Rene deserves to go the most.
Chris Rene is through. Uh oh. The Stereo Hogzz and Lakoda Rayne are in the bottom two. The groups are cursed! People don’t want to be fans of more than one person.
Lakoda Rayne is singing No Air for their survival song. It started out very shaky, but they did their best. Their harmony was off.
The Hogzz won me over at hello. They’re singing Michael Jackson’s You Are Not Alone. Well, at least the lead singer is. He sort of sounds like Slim from 112. To me, they are the better group, but I imagine it’s much easier to sell four fair-skinned girls to a country audience.
LA Reid chooses to send home The Stereo Hogzz.
Nicole admits to choosing Lakoda Rayne because of female empowerment. Ass!
Paula chooses to not vote, and then says she’ll choose to send home Lakoda Rayne just so the Hogzz have a chance. She was an absolute nut case, crazy mess during this entire process.
Simon is so going to send home the Hogzz. I can just feel it. He sends home the Hogzz. Damn.
It goes to show what I said last week. America can’t latch onto groups like they can latch onto solo acts. Next year, they shouldn’t even have groups.