I love a good trashy tell-all. I sure found one in spades when I read Bobbie Brown’s Dirty Rocker Boys

Remember this song?

Warrant’s biggest hit…

Back in the early 1990s, Warrant’s “Cherry Pie” was a big hit. I was in college when the song and the video were especially popular. One guy I knew had a girlfriend and he used to affectionately called her “Sherry Pie”, a moniker that soon spread to the rest of his female friends. For awhile, a couple of my male buddies were routinely calling me “Jenny Pie”, even though I was never a big fan of hairbands nor was I dating any of those guys.

Over twenty years later, I happened to be snooping TelevisionWithoutPity.com for information about former Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader, Courtney Cook, who had mysteriously left the team for some dramatic reason not revealed on the DCC’s reality TV show, Making the Team. I didn’t find any relevant information about Courtney Cook’s sudden departure from the team, but someone did post a link to the 1987 Miss Teen USA pageant, which featured performances by the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders.

In 1987, current DCC director Kelli Finglass was still on the team at performed at the pageant. Team choreographer, Judy Trammell, also happened to be performing that night. As I watched the clip of them, it occurred to me that I had actually seen the pageant when it originally aired. Since my husband was out of town, I ended up watching the entire pageant. One of the contestants that year was Bobbie Brown, who was Miss Teen Louisiana and had a crazy future ahead of her as a model, video star, and ex wife and lover of several rock stars and actors.

Bobbie Brown’s interview begins at 3:15. In a prophetic statement, she says that she loves modeling and hopes to find an agent who can “get her work”.

Bobbie Brown has been through a whole lot since her fresh faced appearances at the Miss Teen USA pageant in 1987. After that experience, she moved to Los Angeles, where she proceeded to audition for the hit talent show, Star Search. I know from my prior Pop Rock Nation posts on Star Search, people still love that show… Well, Bobbie Brown was very successful in the spokesmodel competition, winning a record 13 times before she finally lost to Debbie James, the other finalist in the $100,000 competition.

This video shows Bobbie Brown’s career on Star Search…

Somehow, I ran across the news that in 2013, Bobbie Brown was going to release a tell all book called Dirty Rocker Boys. Brown wrote this book with assistance from ghost writer, Caroline Ryder. Since I love trashy tell-alls by celebrities, I decided to download the book. As of early this morning, I have finished the book and am left with mixed impressions. The book, which is written as if Bobbie Brown is sitting in the room talking to you, is full of lurid details about her sexual escapades with a long line of rock stars. She started with the relatively benign Matthew Nelson of Nelson, then moved on to Rob Pilatus of Milli Vanilli. Jani Lane, lead singer of Warrant eventually became her husband for three years and fathered her daughter, Taylar. When Lane began drinking heavily and cheating on her, Brown moved on to Tommy Lee, whom she was “seeing” right up until Lee’s marriage to Pamela Anderson, one of Brown’s contemporaries and a big star in her own right.

After partying with Tommy Lee, Brown moved on to Mark McGrath, Leonardo DiCaprio, Sebastian Bach, Ashley Hamilton and then Dave Navarro. She writes that Orgy’s Jay Gordon taught her why some women love receiving oral sex. She also had minor trysts with Kevin Costner and Rod Stewart. What I thought was especially funny was that at one point, she wondered if Tommy Lee had any sexually transmitted infections. Under the circumstances, I would have wondered the same thing about Bobbie Brown. She certainly got around. Her lifestyle in the 1990s was all about sex, drugs, and rock and roll.

Bobbie writes about her upbringing in Baton Rouge, Louisiana and about how her father wasn’t around much when she was growing up. She had big dreams of being a Hollywood star and she did have some brief fame in her modeling pursuits. Unfortunately, besides getting sexually involved with rock stars, she made the choice to take drugs. Brown is very detailed as she describes her experiences with crystal meth, cocaine, and speed. She explains that the drugs helped her feel like she was in control, and yet they were the main reason why she ended up broke and nearly homeless on several occasions. More than once, she sent her daughter, Taylar, to her mother in Louisiana because her own life was such a mess.

At times, Brown comes across as likable enough. She does seem to have a pretty good sense of humor and a good heart. At other times, she comes off as immature, self-centered, and self-pitying. It’s hard to reconcile that sweet-faced teenager who was Miss Teen Louisiana in 1987 with the skanky, foul-mouthed, drug-addicted ho she eventually became in the 1990s. On the other hand, I did expect to read trash and I got what I came for, I guess. Brown also includes photos, some of which are a bit graphic. Besides the photos of her family and exes, there are also a couple of photos of her in bed just after having had sex. There’s another one of her tonguing one of her many paramours. One weird shot makes her look almost like she’s been decapitated. Since Bobbie Brown is a model, I’m surprised she’d want that image in her book.

Anyway, if you’re looking for a trashy tell-all about hairbands and hos, I would say you’ll find it in spades with Dirty Rocker Boys… though in fairness, that title should probably also include dirty skanks, too. Seems to me that Bobbie Brown gave as good as she got, though by the end of the book, it did seem like she was starting to change her ways and had developed more depth of character. She had kind things to say about Jani Lane, who sadly died alone in a Comfort Inn after an alcoholic binge. She had developed a relationship with her father, who died about two weeks after her beloved stepfather had passed away. And it sounds like her daughter, Taylar, was smart enough to see that the hedonistic excesses of rock star life were not for her. I’d say that’s somewhat close to a happy ending.

If you like lurid tell alls and are curious about Bobbie Brown, I’d say her book is worth reading. It’s a definite pass for those who don’t want to read about sex, drugs, and rock and roll.