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Category: News

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  • New Music Files 11/24/08: Special Monday Edition

    I hope the music industry doesn’t use this week as a model going forward.

    Not only are there albums coming out this Tuesday, like normal, but there’s also a handful of albums coming out today (Monday), and one album that came out yesterday (Sunday)! All of this left me at a loss for when I was going to publish my column this week. Y’all can’t be doin’ that, record industry.

    Anyway, lots of big names this week. Here’s the line-up.

    Guns ‘n Roses Chinese Democracy: You’ve waited fourteen years. You thought it would never see the light of day in your lifetime. Hell, most of us never thought it would see the light of day in ANYONE’s lifetime. However, Axl Rose and his merry band of scabs have finally released Chinese Democracy. One of you guys will have to tell me whether it’s worth the wait. Unless I hear absolutely mind-blowing things, I’ll stick to my copy of Appetite for Destruction…although I must admit that I am intrigued. BTW, this album is only being released at Best Buy stores, bestbuy.com and iTunes.

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  • Not Necessarily The News – Whitney Houston, Michael Jackson, and Kanye West

    Is Whitney Houston Undefeated?
    US vs. Them had this possible album cover for Whitney Houston’s next album. I’m not sure it’s legit, but if it is, she has absolutely no idea what sexy is. I’m Your Baby, Tonight Whitney had a little appeal to her. Undefeated Whitney must look up to Calista Flockhart. And I just insulted Harrison Ford.

    Michael Hasn’t Made An Album In 7 Years And Dude Is Still In The News
    Neverland is no more. The Sheikh of Bahrain sues him. And a mystery illness keeps him from traveling. If Mike put out an album every 2 years, he wouldn’t have all this free time to screw up so much. I just hope he doesn’t tell the Sheikh, “You ain’t bad, you ain’t nothin!”

    Kanye West Says There Are Limitations To Rapping
    Maybe limitations to his rapping? Well, the man who is going to make auto tune go out of style says the reason he sings is because …

    I can get a rise out of you by spitting a really good punch line and stuff, but what if I tried to … what if I tried to teach you your ABCs like this: ‘A… B… C… D…’ — as soon as you think ABCs, you think of the melody. You were taught with it. I’m trying to deliver a message and melody throughout the entire [album]. I still come from a hip-hop vibe though, yeah.”

    I’m not sure that really made sense, but basically he’s saying that he’s trying to reach us through his singing. He wants his music to be as memorable as the melody to the ABCs. Well, what he should understand is that we get that melody from the great production of his rap songs and he hasn’t had to sing a lick. I’m very scared about 808s & Heartbreak.

    Until next time …

  • Is Beyonce’s “Sasha Fierce” Just Another Sasha Farce??

    I want to like Beyonce. Really I do. She’s fantastic looking. She has a fantastic voice. However, over the course of four Destiny’s Child albums and now three solo albums, she’s mostly struck me as the musical equivalent of a ton of pretty wrapping paper with no gift inside. All style and no substance. As a songwriter, she’s not especially insightful, and it doesn’t really seem like she inhabits the songs she sings the same way some less talented but more believable vocalists do. So, to make a long story short, just about every album Beyonce has been a part of has been a case of unfulfilled promise and ultimately a frustrating listening experience.

     

     

     

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